I blogged a few days ago about how I had noticed a theme to my current food intake – find that post here – in that my diet is devoid of colour. I said then that it was safe, although I didn’t know why. I still don’t.
It is the school holidays here, and my daughter always likes to get in the kitchen and rustle up treats. On Wednesday she made chocolate brownies – none for me, thank you – and she wants to make ginger biscuits at some point. She also asked if she could help cook some meals.
And therein lies the problem. I am not eating hot food, or even anything approaching a meal at the moment. So, simply, she can’t cook us a meal. But I also cannot tell her why she can’t, because she is body conscious enough without finding out about my (carefully concealed) issues with food. I could let her cook but I can’t abide waste and my portion would almost certainly go uneaten, or I could attempt to find something she can cook that fits into my beige diet and that we will both eat which is pretty impossible, or let her cook something I might be able to attempt to pick at once it’s cold.
I managed to add a slice of ham on Tuesday and I had Ribena in my bottle of water, but apart from that my food intake remains devoid of colour, of taste and of heat. I am used to either eating, or not eating. I do not understand this restricted menu, who it is for or why I must eat it. And without all that information I cannot see a way forward to a more varied and healthy diet.
So I do what I always do – shrug it off and add an extra sugar to my tea.