I was vaguely discussing identity with a friend and it got me thinking – who am I? Aside from my parts, I have been three distinct versions of me – there is the me I was as a child, followed by the me I was up until I moved here, at which point I drew a line in the sand and stepped over it, and then finally there is the me I am now.
But who am I, really? I’m not sure I know. Am I in any way distinct from either my previous identities or my parts? Probably not.
Some people seem to have a different persona online compared to their real, offline self but I am pretty much the same in both the real and virtual worlds. I don’t know how to carve out a new, improved, online version of me so I stick with who and what I already am.
Then again, I am also the person my team and other mental health professionals write notes about and discuss in CPA appointments. But I don’t recognise that person, never have done. So maybe I am also that identity? Or my own perception of self is skewed and that person is actually my current identity, that of a service user.
I have reached the same conclusion as my friend, although probably by a different route – I have no idea who I am away from my roles as, for example, a parent. I thought I knew who I was, but it seems I was wrong.