I realised this morning when I opened the medicine cupboard that I have been stockpiling medication. When I say ‘I’, I mean a part of me, not this me. I don’t know when, or how, but when I opened the door an assortment of prescribed and over the counter meds avalanched out onto the worktop.
It has never been part of my plan to overdose – it’s far too hit and miss for my liking and will probably make me ill rather than finishing me off. But there is a part, I’m not sure who, that thinks this is a really good way to go and will stock up on aspirin, paracetamol, ibuprofen and the like.
Hopefully this is a ‘just in case’ scenario because I’m not aware of anyone with a time limit for their plan, but until I am able to control what each part is doing it remains a concern. It seems I am the only one who knows that we share a physical body – they are, as I said here the other day, unaware that destruction of themselves would also destroy me, that destruction of me would also destroy them.
The landslide of meds has been disposed of, leaving enough to treat a headache but not enough to do any harm. I’m sure they will mount up again, they always do. But, for now, I am able to stop whatever part it is from doing me (us) any harm.